Sunday, June 15, 2008

On Healthy Relationships in Recovery: by Peter S. Lopez aka: Peta

http://prorecovery.blogspot.com/2008/06/on-healthy-relationships-in-recovery-by.html

Date: Father’s Day ~ Sunday, June 15, 2008

michelangelo-creation+

Main Entry: crea•ture
Pronunciation: \ˈkrē-chər\
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Anglo-French, from Late Latin creatura, from Latin creatus, past participle of creare
Date: 14th century
1: something created either animate or inanimate: as a: a lower animal; especially : a farm animal b: a human being c: a being of anomalous or uncertain aspect or nature
2: one that is the servile dependent or tool of another: instrument
— crea•tur•al \ˈkrē-chə-rəl\ adjective
— crea•ture•hood \ˈkrē-chər-ˌhu̇d\ noun
— crea•ture•li•ness \-lē-nəs\ noun
— crea•ture•ly \-lē\ adjective

~ Introduction ~

Genesis 1:27-28 (Ancient Eastern Text) ~ So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. And God blessed them, and God said to them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and fill the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the wild beasts that move upon the earth.

According to the Holy Bible, all of creation, earth and all living creatures, including human beings, were created by the Great Soul of the Creator of the cosmos. On a spiritual level, the cosmic consciousness of our immortal inner soul is intimately connected to the supreme consciousness of Creator God in timeless endless eternity.

Isaiah 40:28-29 (AET) ~ Have you not known? Have you not heard, that God is the Lord for ever, who has created the ends of the earth? that he does not faint, neither is weary? and that there is no searching of his understanding? He gives power to the weary, and to them that are stricken with disease he increases strength.

As creatures of the creator created in the Creator’s image, human beings are all one species of life in the human family of humankind, the human race of homo-sapiens. Related by our human relationships to each other we are all one with the same original roots despite outward appearances.

Main Entry: race
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle French, generation, from Old Italian razza
Date: 1580
1 a breeding stock of animals
2 a family, tribe, people, or nation belonging to the same stock b: a class or kind of people unified by shared interests, habits, or characteristics
3 an actually or potentially interbreeding group within a species; also : a taxonomic category (as a subspecies) representing such a group b: breed c: a category of humankind that shares certain distinctive physical traits
4 obsolete : inherited temperament or disposition
5 distinctive flavor, taste, or strength

The whole idea of distinct separate races of people is a social construction of man’s invention. Naturally, there are cultural, ethnic and language differences but we are still of the same stock, the same species of life.

In today’s world we witness unhealthy relationships between cultures, nations, states, tribes and sexes that hinder our unity as one people upon Mother Earth. We should all be unified together based upon our common heritage, our common survival interests and our collective desire for life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness.

Isaiah 43:10 (AET) ~ You are my witnesses, says the LORD, and my servants whom I have chosen: that you may know and believe me and understand that I am he; before me there was no God created, neither shall there be after me. I, even I, am the Lord; and besides me there is no lord.

~ True Believers ~

There are three kinds of believers: the true believer, the make-believer and the non-believer. The true believer believes in Creator God, the basic principles of the Holy Bible and the Ten Commandments. Some believers take everything in the Bible literally; they can cite the letter of the law yet fail to grasp the true meaning of the spirit of the law. Our Creator is loving, kind, truthful, merciful and forgiving, not automatically judging, mechanically condemning and always sending people to hell!

Remember the Holy Bible was written by prophets of old who were inspired by Creator to lift their pen and write words but that process was filtered by the hand of man. If we take the Holy Bible literally only the Ten Commandments were written by the finger of God.

Exodus 31:18 (AET) ~ And he gave to Moses, when he had made an end of talking with him on mount Sinai, two tablets of testimony, the stone tablets written by the finger of God.

It is the make-believers that cause the most trouble and confusion among us because they are wolves in sheep clothing, hypocrites and liars who say one thing and do another, who twist and turn Scriptures out of its original context to serve their own selfish personal agendas. When potential believers see their evil ways they are turned off to God’s truth, Christian teachings and organized religion in general.

Non-believers have the right to be lost in unbelief and we cannot force anyone to believe in anything against their free will. Some consider themselves scientists yet fail to see the balanced unity between science and spirituality.

“But science can only be created by those who are thoroughly imbued with the aspiration toward truth and understanding. This source of feeling, however, springs from the sphere of religion. To this there also belongs the faith in the possibility that the regulations valid for the world of existence are rational, that is, comprehensible to reason. I cannot conceive of a genuine scientist without that profound faith. The situation may be expressed by an image: science without religion is lame, religion without science is blind.” Source: Albert Einstein on Science vs. Religion [1941]
http://www.spaceandmotion.com/albert-einstein-god-religion-theology.htm

We require true believers who do so of their own free will with undying faith, scientific knowledge and deep understanding of the truth. We teach by patient persuasion, not forceful compulsion. Some people are not ready for the truth with a desire for and fear of the truth. Let them alone as connected reality has a habit of sticking around and sometimes folks have to hit their bottom before they look up.

Naturally it is the inner soul’s natural quest to be one with Creator, not as make-believers or non-believers. As true believers in Creator, it is our obligation to love the Creator with all of our being and love one another as we should love ourselves. We are finding our way home back to oneness with the Creator of the Cosmos and ourselves.

Matthew 22:36-40 (AET) ~ Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the law? Jesus said to him, Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might and with all your mind. This is the greatest and the first commandment. And the second is like to it, Love your neighbor as yourself. On these two commandments hang the law and the prophets.

By definition, a true believer should be a humane being with tender care, deep concern and loving compassion for all living beings. All the great religions share the same core belief in Creator. Different Christian Church denominations are all branches of the same tree. On the quantum level Christians do not have an exclusive monopoly on Creator who belongs to all of us. There are many pathways to an inner revelation of Creator. Ours is not the one and only way, ours is another way. One should be a humane Christian and love our Great Creator in unity with Muslims, with Jews, with Buddhists and all honest true believers of the Creator. Even an innocent child can know Creator and see manifestations of Creator in the shine of the golden poppy and other natural wonders of nature, such as, the countless stars in the clear night sky. We can all claim a belief in Creator as our natural birthright as humane beings.

On a higher level of consciousness we should understand that we are spiritual humane beings in a physical body having a lifetime experience. The humane being is composed of the trinity of the mind, body and soul. An inner imbalance in any one of these three elements impacts on the other two. For example, a depressed mind can lower the body’s immune system, weaken the spirit and further deepen mental depression. All of life is in connected reality. No one who has lived for any length of time in this world has come out of it all pure and spotless without blemish or stain. The key is to find a healthy balance in all our relationships and change or cut loose those relationships that cause us to be out-of-balance and harm our basic survival interests. Our basic survival interests are always the same: food, clothing, shelter, medical care and basic education.

In relation to drug addiction, we are the most addicted society in all of human history with more addicts suffering from the affliction of addiction all the time. Here there are great social imbalances that can end up in death and destruction. It is not just the petty criminal dope dealer in the alley who is the problem. The drug lobbies, the drug industries and drug treatment industries are multi-billion dollar businesses. The major source of drugs in general and drug addiction in particular is from legal pharmaceutical drugs prescribed by licensed physicians.

“The elderly are among those most vulnerable to prescription drug abuse or misuse because they are prescribed more medications than their younger counterparts. Most people take prescription medications responsibly; however, an estimated 48 million people (ages 12 and older) have used prescription drugs for nonmedical reasons in their lifetimes. This represents approximately 20 percent of the U.S. population.”
Source: Nora D. Volkow, M.D., Director National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA) ~ 2005
http://www.drugabuse.gov/ResearchReports/Prescription/Prescription.html

Recovering addicts who have overcome the demon of denial about their addiction recognize the sickness of the disease of drug addiction. We are sick people trying to get well, not bad people trying to be good. We inherited much of our sickness from the sickness of previous generations. Unless we are treated, healed and cured we will continue to spread social sickness to the present generation and future unborn generations.

In our spiritual growth, we should admit that we have serious internal core spiritual issues, labeled as various forms of mental illness with complex classifications that cloud these core spiritual issues. We need to come together and work on our own spiritual healing. It all comes down to healing the spirit of our inner soul. Whether addicts or not, many of us suffer from major character defects, personal shortcomings and untreated disorders that are ultimately spiritual in origin. These are in turn related to the governing social conditions of hungry, poverty and oppression in the world and an inner separation between Creator and our inner soul. We believe that in conscious communion with Creator, honesty in all our relations and by working with others in recovery there is a real cure for drug addiction and for all our basic ailments.

~ Recovering Addicts In Progressive Recovery ~

As recovering addicts, we need to stay alert and alive all along the way. As we continue working on progressive recovery, we also have to deal with the personal shame and social stigma of having been drug addicts that is projected onto us by those in the world who are conditioned to being judgmental and harbor prejudice against drug addicts in general. Many times this hurts the most when it comes from close family members and loved ones who do not understand the disease of drug addiction. We have a lot of real obstacles before us to overcome and real challenges we must face head on. Compassion will rule the day. Recovery cannot easily happen when we are isolated all alone on an individual level against great social forces against us and around us. We need powerful group support of all kinds and daily fellowship with others for moral support, wise instruction and spiritual inspiration.

We also need to educate the general public about addiction-related issues and not hide our truth in any assumed anonymity. We were not anonymous in our times of wild addiction, why should be pretend to be underground and anonymous in our recovery nowadays? This is why progressive recovery advocates us being community activists, sharing our stories with others and helping out in the local community as mature functional adults and responsible world citizens.

“I just know that you are expected, at some point, to do more than carry the Message of A.A. to other alcoholics. In A.A. we aim not only for sobriety---we try again to become citizens of the world that we rejected, and the world that once rejected us. This is the ultimate demonstration toward which Twelfth Step work is the first but not the final step.”
Source: As Bill Sees It: Citizens Again, Bill Wilson LETTER 1959

Christians against substance addiction are waging real spiritual warfare on a constant basis between the forces of light versus the forces of darkness. We must use all the spiritual weapons at our command in order to win this drug war against drug addicts that has resulted in entire communities being torn apart, thousands being in prison and millions treated as social outcasts by the larger society.

“Between 1980 and 1998 the total number of new admissions of drug offenders to state and federal prison exceeded 1.5 million. Between 1980 and 2003 the number of drug offenders in state prisons grew twelvefold. In 2006 an estimated 248,547 men and women were serving time in state prisons for drug offenses, constituting 19.5 percent of all state prisoners.”
Source: Targeting Blacks: Drug Law Enforcement and Race in the United States
http://hrw.org/reports/2008/us0508/3.htm#_ftn25

As part of a wholistic Spiritual Program recovering addicts require progressive recovery in order to combat drug addiction and its related evils: lost homes, prisons, institutions and death. We need to be working on a wholistic healing process that helps the whole humane being and his immediate environment. The term 'wholistic' is a combination of the words ‘whole’ and ‘holy’. Drug addiction is a total disease as it attacks the mind, body and soul. Yet it is also a symptom of deeper spiritual demons or diseases that we must closely examine, medically treat and spiritually heal. A Spiritual Program will naturally help enhance our progressive recovery program.

Our healing is a protracted long-term developing process that advances through different stages of growth: from early recovery, to continued recovery, to advanced recovery when one becomes ever closer to oneness with Creator, has achieved an inward peace with one’s inner soul and lives in unity with others. We need to be cured of the inner divisors that separate us from God, from ourselves and our loved ones. In harmony with the Creator we need to work on a cure for the worldwide plague of drug addiction.

Jeremiah 33:6 (AET) ~ Behold, I will bring to it a long period of healing, and I will heal them and will reveal to them the paths of peace and truth.

~ Adult Relationships ~

Proverbs 15:16-17(AET) “Better is little with reverence for the Lord than the great treasures of the wicked. Better is a dinner of vegetables where love is than fatted steer and hatred with it.”

A major source of widespread social sickness is the harmful adult relationships we get ourselves involved in and keep getting tangled up in because of our own bad personal choices, individual circumstances and existing toxic environments. Many of us get caught up in rotten relationships, lousy marriages and poor living arrangements over and over again for long hard years without relief. Spousal abuse and forms of spousal violence, broken windows in broken homes, children forever lost to CPS and hate-filled bad divorces are common events in today’s civil society.

The choice for a marriage partner is one of the most important choices we can make all our lives. Unfortunately, many people have ‘broken pickers’ when it comes to matrimony or the commitment required for long-term intimate relationships. Approximately 50% of all marriages in Amerika end in divorce, getting higher with more marriages per person.

“The divorce rate in America for first marriage, vs. second or third marriage:
50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second and 74% of third marriages end in divorce, according to Jennifer Baker of the Forest Institute of Professional Psychology in Springfield, Missouri.”
Source: http://www.divorcerate.org/

Many couples nowadays do not even legally marry or intend to get married in the near future that never becomes the present today. Many couples can remain together unmarried for decades yet live together as married couples with all its commitments, responsibilities and entanglements. Cleary there is a lot of fear, mistrust and reluctance when it comes to making a lifetime commitment to the legal contract of matrimony between two people.

What was once pure love can gradually wither away, decay and degenerate into pure hate without proper attention, nourishment and cultivation. Thus, we all need to work on consciously building up healthy relationships in recovery with our Creator, our inner soul and with our loved ones, especially when it comes to personal relationships between a man and woman.

~ Three Key Relationships in Life ~

Ephesians 3:14-19 “For this cause I bow my knees to the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, For whom all fatherhood in heaven and earth is named, To grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might by his Spirit, That Christ may dwell in your inner man by faith, and in your hearts by love, strengthening your understanding and your foundation, so that you may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the height and depth and length and breadth, And to know the love of Christ which surpasses all knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.”

In the life of the advanced humane being, three key personal relationships are:

1. The relationship between our Creator and the creature,

2. The relationship between the creature and the inner soul, and

3. The relationship between the creature and other creatures.

Healthy loving relationships in all areas of our lives are essential for us to open up new doorways to self-knowledge, give us practical guidelines for living at peace with others and help us progress in our spiritual evolution as humane beings. Healthy personal relationships, in the vast spiritual realm, in our business dealings and in our personal lives are mirrors of ourselves so we can come to know and see ourselves better from different perspectives through our various relationships. Let your mirrors be clean.

~ The Relationship Between the Creator and the Creature ~

2 Chronicles 7:14 (AET) ~ If my people who are called by my name shall humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways; then I will hear from heaven and will forgive their sins and will heal their land.

The Creator of all living creatures is the supreme ruler known in the masculine sense as God, though our Creator is beyond any sexual gender. We could use the terms Creator, Jehovah, Living God, Goddess and the Great Spirit interchangeably to get the same basic meaning.

Exodus 3:14 (AET) ~ And God said to Moses, I am AHIAH ASHAR HIGH (that is, THE LIVING GOD); and he said, Thus you shall say to the children of Israel: AHIAH has sent me to you.

We need to create, build and establish a personal spiritual relationship with our Creator. To do so we must completely surrender our arrogant vanity, get on both knees in heartfelt prayers, practice daily inner meditation and stay well grounded in God’s wisdom, common sense and the ancient spiritual teachings. Once we accept Creator God as our highest power, we need to admit and repent of our sins, ask for forgiveness and vow to sin no more. We must come to know God, be true to our inner souls and examine our own personal role in bringing about any chaos, calamity and confusion in our lives because of our failure to be obedient to the commandments of God.

Many tortured lost souls are separated from our Creator and His Son Jesus Christ of Nazareth. For them the ideal of an invisible supernatural God is an unbelievable abstract concept without a complete definition. The Holy Bible ~ The Book of Books ~ of the Old Testament and the New Testament seems so old, irrelevant and outdated to them. God is dead to them while their inner soul is dead in sin mourning the chasm between itself and the Creator. They have fallen far away from God’s amazing grace and desperately need a strong spiritual revival emboldened by the Holy Spirit in their lives. They do not recognize their true self-interest as being one with the Creator and ultimately suffer from the original sin of separation from our Creator.

Unbelievers are on real slippery ground without any sound spiritual stability. They are disconnected, lost and alone in the cosmos because of their unbelief and in their hearts do not really believe in God. Many are make-believers, pretending to be Christians in Church pews on Sundays, lacking true love for others and busy being of the devil all the rest of the week. Is the great cosmos, all the vast countless galaxies, the majesty of Mother Earth, the marvelous wonders of nature and all living beings mere freak accidents or weird biological mutations brought about by a Big Bang in the beginning of time? Or was there a Maker?

John 8:28 (AET) ~ Again Jesus said to them, When you have lifted up the Son of man, then you will understand that I am he, and I do nothing of my own accord; but as my Father has taught me, so I speak just like him.

To be humble before God is to have a proper perspective of ourselves in relation to others, to submerge our haughty ego, to admit ignorance of all we do not know and to honestly examine the sources of our false opinions about God, Jesus Christ and religion:

● What was our early religious upbringing as children, if any?
● If we were once believers what happened that turned us off from God?
● Did God really abandon us or did we give up on ourselves alone in bitterness?

Many of our sufferings are because we do not know the Creator, connected reality and our role within it all. We suffer from low self-esteem or no self-esteem. In our healing we should strive to achieve a high level of self-esteem with self-love, self-respect and self-confidence.

We are the only species of life upon Mother Earth that can define, explain and know ourselves as conscious living beings. Humans have had more of an impact on the external environment, positive and negative, than any other species of life. With a multi-dimensional perception that includes the spiritual realm and is beyond our ordinary five sense-organs we can be self-conscious of ourselves and become conscious of our Creator. Ultimately, we need to establish a spiritual relationship with our loving Creator, love ourselves and have humane love towards all other creatures of the Creator.

~ The Relationship Between the Creature and the Inner Soul ~

2 Corinthians 5:17 (AET) ~ Whoever from now on is a follower of Christ is a new creation; old things have passed away; And all things have become new through God who has reconciled us to himself by Jesus Christ and has given to us the ministry of reconciliation; For God was in Christ, who has reconciled the world with his majesty, not counting their sins against them; and has committed to us the word of reconciliation.

As a humane being, the inner soul of the creature must be reconciled with Creator, not as a separate self alone. Our inner soul has endured from one lifetime incarnation to the next throughout many lifetimes: experiencing lifetimes of experiences, learning and relearning lessons and enduring spiritual struggles throughout the ages on its journey back home to its original source: our Divine Creator.

In this lifetime, we must remember to go back and think about our early childhood:

● How were we raised in our family of origin?
● What kind of experiences molded our personalities?
● What happened to us along the way that turned us into addicts?
● What are the most important lessons in life we have learned so far?

We should always have more questions than answers as we continue to learn about ourselves and others. We need to know our true past in order to better see our present life situation in the light of clarity no matter how painful simply remembering the past can be. We must unblock our memories to learn more about whom we are today, especially remembering the lessons from our mistakes in life involving relationships.

We are the result of our own individual choices, decisions and determinations. It does no good to blame our childhood, the environment or the government as to why we became drug addicts. No one crammed a bottle of booze down our throats or accidentally injected a hypodermic needle into our veins. We did it all to ourselves. We allowed ourselves to become addicts. We must now be fully accountable and accept our personal responsibility for both our becoming addicts and for our own personal progressive recovery from drug addiction. We must bear the weight of the consequences of our choices and decisions in our lives without complaint. In the end, we are the ones who brought about the main problems in our lives.

Nowadays, it is up to us to work together on solutions to our problems. We cannot afford to sit around waiting idly for a Savior or a wizard with a magic wand to save us. We must save ourselves and meet God at least half way to go all the way and receive our redemption.

Ultimately, it is up to us to figure it all out the best we can with the help of spiritual guides, our recovery support network of friends and fellow recovering addicts we meet at 12-Steps Group Meetings. It cannot all come from any Holy Bible, any Big Book, or any great guru. It is the living breathing book you yourself must write from the pages of your own life experience as you work your own program on a daily basis. Know yourself well, reach out for help and work closely with others in recovery. Do not isolate in misery and silent suffering!

No one else can clean up your own mess for you to heal. You yourself must make your life what you want it to be using your intuition, intention, intelligence and imagination or give up, wallow in self-pity and be stuck with a self-image of yourself as another powerless victim of circumstances beyond your immediate control. You can either be a victor or a victim. It is up to you to decide what you want to do with your life because it is your life for better or worse. Make it better and be a winner in life.

Each of us has a purpose and mission in life we can fulfill with a Spiritual Program. A Spiritual Program should include finding your major mission in life and asking our Creator for guides to help you find the ways and means to fulfill your mission. If you suspect there is something missing in your life or you feel that there is something you need to be doing that you are not doing, it could be that you are not fulfilling the life purpose of your mission in life!

~ The Relationship Between the Creature and Other Creatures ~

John 15:12-14 (AET) ~ This is my commandment, That you love one another, just as I have loved you. There is no greater love than this, that a man lay down his life for the sake of his friends. You are my friends if you do everything that I command you.

In humane relationships, the key to establishing healthy relationships between our inner soul and others is by creating, developing and nurturing genuine loving friendships based upon humane love, high respect and common interests. Many educational books have already been written on relationships and there is valuable information available online on the Internet. Seek and ye shall find!

In humane life, there are different kinds of human relationships, such as:

● the parent-child relationship,
● the business-professional relationship,
● the legal-marriage relationship, and
● the special-personal relationship

Here we discuss the basics of healthy relationships in recovery for the recovering addict that involves the special-personal relationship between two people of the opposite sex that naturally includes sexual intimacy. Many times it is involvement in intimate relations that causes havoc for the recovering addict, especially in early recovery.

First we must admit that our lives have become unmanageable to one degree or another and have become burdened with trouble and turmoil. Do not wait and procrastinate until a bad situation gets worse. We must equip ourselves with the tools we need to manage our lives in creative ways. We are here to know ourselves better than anyone else, find the good in us and work on healing our souls, not bed hop from one broken heart to another.

Many people do not really know who they are in the quintessence of their inner soul and need to work on personal spiritual growth before getting intimately involved with someone else. Many forget to just stop, be still in their unique beingness and be alone in harmony with their inner soul. One should appreciate the lone solitude of one’s own loving company without feeling lonely. Are you really comfortable in your own skin? If you do not already know and love you, then you are not even ready for a successful loving relationship!

Many people fear being all alone with the conscience of their inner soul. For example, for couples the ‘significant other’ always has to be around or within reach, especially if one is half of a whole couple, which means one’s self-image is as half a person, not as a whole person. The insanity of insecurity prevails: jealousy, possessiveness and being domineering or letting yourself be dominated.

Many of us fail to ever do a deep personal self-inventory and fail to do daily personal inventories to check in with our inner soul. Why do we think, feel and do as we think, feel and do? In fact, many people are so busy running around in concentric circles doing different activities and get easily distracted because they are not at peace with themselves. We should be humane beings, not human doings.

If you are now a single adult, chances are that all your previous relationships have utterly failed. Think! You are single here now! If you desire a serious lasting long-term relationship with a significant other after being involved in a number of past intimate relationships that have all failed then you should humbly pray, quietly meditate and think hard before getting involved in another relationship simply because of your private loneliness. Do not fantasize about future lasting relationships when all of your past ones have failed and you have not figured out why! Do not forget all about the possible results of ruined relationships: emotional heartache, personal pain and collateral wreckage, including financial loss. Remember the lessons of past mistakes, know who you are and comprehend connected reality!

In essence, the basis of a healthy loving relationship is best based upon the Golden Rule: “do unto others as you would have done to yourself.”

We should know our true motive in being in a relationship. Is it just for sex or another ulterior motive? Be smart and engage in critical thinking. Be cynical and question the true motives of people without being senile and always suspicious. A false friendship leads to deception, insecurity and treachery. True friendship should be based upon what is the best for the both of you, not selfish personal gain. Genuine friendship is free of petty jealousy, weak insecurity and useless rivalry. You want your best friend to be aware, advance and continue in his or her spiritual growth with or without you. Personal spiritual growth that fosters inner enlightenment is the key for all of us to advance in our spiritual journey through life.

Proverbs 27:17 (AET) ~ Iron sharpens iron; so a man enlightens the face of his friend.

Be honest in your personal relationship and establish open terms of endearment. Why do you want to be together in a union? Is it for companionship, sharing good times together and helping each other out? Or is it to gain a status symbol, personal prestige or mere animal lust? Are you practicing safe sex during intercourse? Do you know the acronym for STD? Do you really know with whom you are sharing the most intimate aspects of your self and who you are sleeping with?

Do not confuse love with lust. Human animals with natural sex drives have a physical attraction for each other, lust for sex and engage in sexual intercourse. Selfish animals seek to only satisfy their own orgasmic sexual needs on a ‘first come, first serve’ basis without any real consideration for the different needs of their mating partner. A true lover is so much more than a piece of raw meat.

In an adult relationship, a couple should first work on being good close friends by spending time together talking about life and their backgrounds; getting to know each other’s philosophy on life and what they want out of a relationship; openly sharing life experiences and events together; and see each other in operation in different social situations among different people out in the real world. Share a sunset together before you share a sunrise. Take all the time you need before rushing heart first into another important relationship or just keep it as casual friends without strings attached or hooks out. Sometimes just being a good close friend without sex is the best way to go.

A good loving friend is a rare gem, will remain a true friend through thick and thin and will help us weather the storms of life. Fair-weather friends are a dime a dozen. Sexual partners can come and go. Sadly, many couples fail to ever develop a true friendship together and eventually split up going their separate ways in life. A true loving friendship grows stronger as time goes by. Lovers should be the best of friends. A true loving friend will last a lifetime!

~ Summary ~

In summary, as humane beings we need loving healthy relationships with the Creator, with our own creative soul and with other creatures in our lives in ways that promote healing our souls, spiritual enlightenment and oneness with God. Seek first the Kingdom of God; know that the communion is within you and all you need will come to you.

Luke 17:21 (AET) “Neither will they say, Behold, it is here! or, behold, it is there! For behold, the kingdom of God is within you.”

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c/s
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http://prorecovery.blogspot.com/

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